Hello Darling, bist Du da? Sag ich so wie jedesmal...

My head is throbbing. I stare into blank spare and breathe in and out, focusing on nothing in particular, but remaining content nonetheless. Happy not to have to think. To not have to be stressed or be worried. I'm home now, playing my music up loud... the only impact I seem to have on the house that I rent anymore. There are now Cleo pictures of half-naked men and women adorning the walls of the toilet and loungeroom. I'd lie if I said I didn't look at gay "art" (aka porn) on occasion. Is the loo the place for that kind of thing? What does one do to make one's point clear? Leave some come smeared all over one of the pictures? The one of the man? ;)

The girls don't talk to me, and I don't waste the time on them. Words wasted, in my opinion. I can only even muster a "hi" now. No eye contact. I am thinking of moving out. On one hand, I don't want to let them get the best of me. They were idiots when I chose them, and it's not their faults that they don't have the vocation I have. Or any vocation, come to think of it. Shame. On the other hand, most of the furniture is mine, and they'd have to replace it all. Me leaving might hit em a bit. I'm sure they'd shrug it off pretty quick, and congratulate one another over McDonalds and cheap beer.

Anyhow, I don't know why I am thinking of this. I am too busy to move. And I love this house. This isn't the first I've been in, but I'd hoped it would be the last that I'd have to stay in for the purposes of being close to Uni. I've even got the best room since the last people left. All closed off here on the side, with a pull-down window shade outside and a mirrored-wardrobe that makes a heck of noise when one tries to open it... makes me shriek every time I open or close it...

There's a new guy in the house now, to add to my woes. He's a Sri Lankan guy, thin and large cranium-ed. He makes that motion that rapper's make with his hands. How this guy got through the other housemates racial filter I'll never know. I think it might have something to do with the nice car that he drives. Oh, it's not that nice... and I'm not really into cars. Sure, if one has a nice arctic blue BMW, I'd swoon. But otherwise, I don't get impressed very much. He's nice enough. Even offered me some of this godamn pizza that he'd bought. But I am in the process of ignoring the other two in such an obvious manner that I couldn't join everyone. It's the principle of the thing.
He even shakes my hand hello. But only after he does that rapper hand motion. You know the one... hold the hand open-palmed around the chest area and then swoop down and forward. What is that all about? Do I respond with "Wassup homie?"

Anyhow, I don't know how effective my loud-music playing is going. I don't have songs that rock the house. Andrea Bocelli and Sarah Brightman singing 'Time to say Goodbye' isn't something one can head bang to. I'm sure it is having no effect at all, but it gives me something to do. Chances are foreign languages scare them. Good. I think I have some French songs on here, too. I'll have to get some German as well. I know I had the German version of 'Mandy' on a CD somewhere...

Oh Mandy, bist Du wirklich am Ende gegangen,
um für immer zu geh'n...?

Oh Mandy, konntest Du's mir nicht wenigstens sagen?
Sowas hilft zu verstehen.
Ooooohh Mandy.

:)

I promised myself an early night, and it has rolled onto quarter to ten already. I didn't get home until past 7pm and I'm a little weary. The phone line is being used up again by the skank, damnit, so I'll just save this and post it tomorrow. (She got off eventually... so I'm doing it tonight! :)

Hey, I just went into the loungeroom. My music is waaaay loud. They even had to close a door to try and block out Van Morrison, but I've turned up the bass to as high as it can go, and there is no escaping it. BWahahahaha! A small victory! I think I'll end off the night with John Lennon's 'Mind Games'... ;)

William John.